This morning we were going about our usual ritual, yogurt smoothies in the living room, Today show on the tv, undranken cold coffee in my mug. Sophie & Sam were going about their routine of taking out every single toy we had put away the night before. Then poor Sam told me she needed to throw up. Weird, right? Of course I rushed her to the toilet, held back her hair & rubbed her back. But she didn’t puke. Didn’t even gag. When I suggested we go back to the living room she freaked, yelling at me to hold her & that she HAD to throw up. We went through this conversation 3 or 4 more times before I got to thinking about if she didn’t really have to throw up then what was her goal in wanting to stay in the bathroom? Why would you rather be in boring, cold bathroom staring into a toilet then under a princess blanket in front of the TV? Then I realized the difference is this…Sophie monster.
That baby is head over heels in love with her big sister. She follows her everywhere, climbs all over her & eats her toys because obviously whatever her sister has is AWESOME. Sam just needed some gosh darn peace & quiet. Sometimes as adults we certainly need a little time away from each other. Hence the day spa, or solo table at Starbucks. Why didn’t I realize that my 3 year old needed some time away from her other half, her sister.
The first 13 years of my life I was an only child. I hated it. Candyland sucks as a solo game. I just assumed that even if Sophie was a tad on the annoying side at least she was a companion & that had to be better than being alone. I think I forgot to consider the fact that some, actually most, people need a little alone time. Now that I think of it Sam really does enjoy to sit and work a puzzle in the other room or sometimes she’ll even slink off to go play in her room for hours & I think that may just having something to do with the fact that Soph can’t get up the stairs. Why did I think that if she & Sophie were both awake than they should be together? Perhaps I didn’t actually “think” too much about it at all.
So the question is how do you determine when to make siblings “deal” with one another & when to give them their own space? Especially if the two parties wouldn’t necessarily agree on which they’d prefer?